Unchained, Family Ties

So many of us, as Black women, carry the weight of childhood trauma. It’s a heavy burden—one that shapes who we become as adults. That trauma either molds us into strong, resilient women who rise above our pasts, or it traps us, leaving us stuck in the shadows of what we’ve endured.

Because of the private nature of Black family life, coupled with flaws in reporting systems, it is nearly impossible to determine how often African American children are sexually abused by relatives or how often they experience deep-rooted childhood trauma. The unspoken code of “what happens in this house stays in this house” has kept countless children silent, afraid of the repercussions of speaking their truth.

This silence allows generational pain to go unchecked, leaving children to navigate the world carrying burdens they should have never had to bear.

Childhood trauma doesn’t just stay in childhood. When parents battle addiction, it ripples through their children’s lives, shaping the way they love, trust, and survive. Many children of addicts grow up battling mental illness, struggling with self-worth, or—even worse—repeating the very cycles that once broke them.

I am one of those children shaped by trauma. A product of drug-addicted parents. A survivor of molestation. A child neglected, unwanted, and left without the presence of a full-time father. The list of wounds is long, but it’s a story many of us share.

For too long, we’ve been told to stay silent. To protect family secrets at all costs. But at what cost? How many children have suffered in silence, waiting for someone—anyone—to speak up for them?

This silence has to stop. We must face these truths, not just for the sake of awareness, but for the sake of healing. For ourselves. For the next generation.

This book is my truth. I’m writing it to show young women that they are not alone, that it’s okay to speak out, and that healing is possible. I’m writing it to remind every woman who has endured the unthinkable that her voice matters.

This is also a story of strength and faith—a testament to what it means to overcome. Despite everything, I am here because the Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.